Breaking The Silence

After a week of gloomy days, difficult mornings and draining nursing care I'm breaking the silence.. Silence that crippled me to the core. Still, calm but hurting from inside. The pain in loss is definitely excruciating.. It prevented me from doing the passions that I used to share with someone. Yes. Sometimes people fall and get hurt out from the complexities most especially if one has build his/her world around someone so precious. I am in the process and the process has been difficult and draining. My mornings turned out to be a regimen of pillow sobs, runny nose and numbing throat. My nights were too slow and sometimes I just don't want to sleep to avoid the difficult waking moments.

Working conditions fluctuates from mild to extreme toxicity. Welling tears is inevitable at work and so as throwing up and puking out of anxiety. It throbs and synchronizes with the heart rhythm. I don't want to be an emotional vampire by writing long posts about the crisis that I am facing. And to you, you were the greatest.. Your imperfections are beautiful your sincerity has captured me. No one has matched your honesty and sincerity. Your beauty radiates in all areas and your words of comfort and endearment resonates within. It melted my heart even at this very day. You turned me head over heals. You drove me crazy... I know I have caused you some insecurities and some pain but I must say I was yours after all and no matter what complexities we both have, it's there... as what you've said it transcends. I don't know when will my heart shall be put at rest. All I know it's gonna take some time. Me encantas por siempre...

This song obviously, is in a woman's perspective. I must say that I am... and I think it's normal..



Jealous of the girl who caught your eye
One of my darker days
When you looked at her where was I?
Shoulda been in her place
Here I am
All alone imagining what could have been
If I had been there

[Chorus:]
Jealous of the one who'se arms are around you
If she's keeping you satisfied
Jealous of the one who finally found you
Made your sun and your stars collide
La la la la la la la
She's a very very lucky girl
La la la la la la la

Jealous of the one who won your heart
They say it's a perfect match
She's gonna get to be where you are
And I don't get better than that
She'll say you're fine
Whisper words I wish were mine
And they might have been
If I had been there

You know I'd fight the good fight
If I thought I'd change your mind
But if she makes you happy
I would leave that dream behind
Man, she better treat you right
And give you everything
Cause at the moment she doesn't (Hmm :-P)
I'll be waiting in the wings

La la la la la la la
She's a very very lucky girl

This is also a personal blog right? ☺